Idgie (feenietime) wrote,
Idgie
feenietime

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IT CAN BE RANT TIEM NAO?

I haven't ranted in a while and this one's been simmering in me for months, so TIGHTEN YOUR SHORTS, PILGRIMS. It won't be pretty.

More specifically, these are my thoughts on the uke/seme, top/bottom, dom/sub whatever-the-hell-else-you-want-to-call-it trend in fandom that's existed for as long as anyone remembers. If you want to get technical, this could apply to any romance genre, but since I'm more familiar with m/m slash, that's where the bias of this rant is going to lie.

In the past, I've made it pretty clear that I hate said trend with a fiery passion. NOT because I don't think people have preferences, as I know most do. It's when those preferences are founded on whether a character is short, tall, has long hair, pretty eyes, or any number of ridiculous “masculine” or “feminine” traits... But before I continue, I want to preface this by stressing that this is only my opinion and I don't think it's wrong in the slightest for people to like this sort of thing. I'm simply irked that it establishes an accepted and expected perception of what a character does or does not like in bed based on whether or not they have a "dominant" or "submissive" personality, or worse, what they look like. What's even more distressing is that, from what I've seen, a lot of those ideas carry over to what people think of gay men in real life.

Again, this is all my opinion, but I have an irrational, pressing need to state exactly why I want to rip my hair out every time someone asks me, "lol you think [insert character name] tops/bottoms? newb"

I like realism. I do. And in reality, sexual preferences (of the "this is the position I like" variety, not the "this is what I identify as" kind) are determined by what feels good, not who's dominant or submissive. Yes, that's a kink. There are people who go out looking for someone to dominate them just as there are people who go out looking for someone to bend to their will, but that's something slightly different and also rarely has anything to do with their personality outside of the bedroom, let alone what they look like. Granted, a character's personality is going to have some affect on how they act during a sexual encounter, but I'd like to think it primarily portends to how likely they are to initiate affection, how far they're willing to go, what they're willing to try, etc, but when all is said and done and they're comfortable with their preferences, it has nothing to do with whether or not they like to take it up the ass. Again, that's something that's determined by what feels good.

Most of the time, unless you're watching/reading/playing something more adult-oriented, a character's bedroom inklings are not even addressed. You know what that means? We can make them up! And we do! I just hate the preconceived notion that it has to be a certain way because of the points outlined above.

And don't get me started on the idea that being on bottom is somehow emasculating. Not only would I say that's offensive to men, it's offensive to women, too. But... that's veering slightly off-topic and has more to do with political and societal views WHOOPS, so I'll end it there.

Fandom is all in fun, right? Of course it is. So why am I even ranting? Because I had nothing better to do. :((( SRS BSNSS GUYZ

Feel free to agree or disagree. I like to hear other people's points of view. :D I’m really not as “RAR H8T U” as I make myself out to be. Like I said, it’s just been SITTING THERE for months. It could have been a lot longer. I... actually had to edit it down to make it readable.
Tags: fandom is srs bsnss, my thoughts on yaoi, rant
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